Although the age and origin of wedding sand ceremonies is
shrouded in history and debate, there's no doubting the abundant symbolism and
growing popularity of the practice -- don't expect to see it disappear any time
soon. Read on to learn the story behind the sand unity ceremony and to find
tips for how to make this tradition a unique part of your wedding day.
The Process of the Sand Ceremony
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The sand
ceremony, in its simplest form, features two glass containers that are each
filled with a different color of sand and placed on either side of a larger
glass container. The container can be empty or filled with a base layer of
neutral-colored sand -- some versions also include an additional small
container of colored sand used by the priest or officiant.
The bride
and groom then take alternating turns, usually accompanied by a short reading
or statement from the officiant, pouring layers of sand into the center
container until it is filled. The officiant next caps the container with a
cork, wax, or airtight lid. The sealed vase then becomes a colorful keepsake
that serves as a powerful reminder of the couple's wedding day.
Sand Ceremony Symbolism
What's
nice about sand ceremonies is their elegant symbolism is immediately
identifiable. The different colors, of course, represent the individual lives
of the bride and groom. Although combined into a single sand ceremony vase, the
layers of color show that both the bride and groom have retained their unique
identities and personalities. Yet, looking closer, it is virtually impossible
to define the exact point where one layer ends and the next begins -- the
grains of sand can never be separated. This is a strong and beautiful
representation of the "two becoming one" concept that has resonated
with couples all over the world.
Create Your Own Look and Style for Your Sand Ceremony
There
are, however, no formal rituals or steps to follow for holding a sand unity
ceremony of your own. Though they are performed at weddings in many faiths,
wedding sand ceremonies are not a traditional part of any major religion. This
fact accounts for the large number of variations of the practice -- so many, in
fact, that sand ceremonies are often unique to each wedding.
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The
colors of the sand, for example, are left up to the bride and groom (though
sometimes neutral colored sand representing God is also used) and can have
deeply personal significance or simply look pretty. There is also no standard
size or shape for the containers -- they can be any shape or size, combined
with other wedding accessories or
decorations, and couples are free to use whatever works best for them.
In the
same way there are also no rules about when during the wedding the sand
ceremony should be held. The most common time is immediately after the bride
and groom speak their vows, but many couples choose to perform the ceremony as
an introduction to them. Other couples have even begun to make the ceremony a
part of the vows themselves, pouring additional sand after each pledge.
Sand Ceremonies and Blended Family Weddings
One
variation of the sand ceremony in particular has become popular among couples
with children. During these blended family weddings the children of the bride
and groom are invited to the altar; each child adds his or her own layer of
colored sand to the container, turning the vase into a symbol of two families
coming together as one. Some couples also choose to involve other close family
members such as their parents and grandparents for the same reason. The fact
that there's nearly no limit to the number of colors that can be used makes
wedding sand ceremonies a unique and easy way for couples to broaden their
celebration to be about more than just them.
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Sand Ceremonies as an Alternative to Unity Candles
Another
variation of the sand ceremony, meanwhile, actually excludes the bride and
groom. In this version the sand ceremony is used as a replacement for the
better known unity candle ceremony, which in some denominations is performed by
the mothers of the wedding couple. The process here is essentially the same,
though in place of each mother using a taper candle to light a central pillar
candle, they pour layers of sand instead.
Regardless
of who pours the sand, sand ceremonies are an increasingly popular alternative
to unity candles, particularly at beach and outdoor weddings where wind can be
a significant factor. The keepsake quality of the sand-filled vase and its
durability relative to candles is also appealing, as candles can be more
difficult to display at home and may melt or deform over time.
Possible Origins of the Sand Ceremony
Just as
the process of holding a sand ceremony has been left up to interpretation,
there is no accepted historical origin of the practice -- some have claimed it
is primarily a 20th century phenomenon while others argue the practice dates
back hundreds if not thousands of years. Sand ceremonies do seem to have first
gained popularity among both native Hawaiians as well continental Native
American communities, but it is unclear if these groups developed the practice
independently from each other or which group did so first.
There are
compelling cases for both sides. Hawaiian weddings often take place on the
beach, for obvious reasons, and many traditional Hawaiian weddings have long
involved the bride and groom scooping sand from around their feet with
seashells and pouring it into a shared container. Native American sandpainting,
meanwhile, is a well-documented and ancient practice that involves artfully
mixing layers of colored sand. Although traditional sandpainting is associated
with healing and not weddings, the longstanding use of sand in Native American
culture, and its continuing use today, suggests that wedding sand ceremonies
may be older than we realize.
A Meaning that Is Universal Across Cultures and Time
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Although
the exact origins of the sand ceremony will likely never be known, in many ways
its blurred history demonstrates just how universal its symbolism is to the
nature love and the human spirit. The idea of contrasting colors of sand that
are each distinct yet permanently mixed together can be found in other cultures
all over the world, from the ancient mandalas of Tibet, to the parlors of
Victorian England, to the sand tray art of Imperial Japan, to the ceremonial
sand imprints of aboriginal Australia.
The bright
colors and simple-yet-majestic meaning behind the sand ceremony makes it far
more than a beach wedding trend or a gimmick from a reality TV show. Indeed,
regardless of how old the current practice might be, its roots can be traced
back to the oldest days of human civilization. So no matter what type of sand
ceremony you hold, rest assured its significance will endure for as long as
there is love.
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